Frustrations

The first day of Spring Break me, Michael, and our friends, David and Ruth went to Margaritaville in Mrytle Beach, SC for Michael's 33rd birthday. David and I have been friends since high school and we get along great. Ruth and Michael have lived with each other for about six years; Ruth is Michael's late wife's sister and so they have been through alot together.

When I started dating Michael, I knew that he loved Ruth. Ruth is asexual and sees Michael as a brother; however, I knew that Michael was emotionally in love and physically wanted to be with her. Now I know that he still has that urge but has come to accept that Ruth is only ever going to see him as a brother. One thing that I also notice, and whether this is Ruth trying to please her older brother or just coincidence, but Ruth and Michael agree on everything, they like the same things, they think the same way, they are almost the same person.

This bothers me a little, because I know that Ruth and Michael will always be best friends, that they will always give each other back rubs/foot massages, will always agree on everything, and will generally always love each other. I know that I am jealous, even though Ruth is overtly sweet and kind to me and will show no real physical interest in Michael ever, but I just don't know how to deal with it. Another thing that really annoys me about Ruth other than the fact that no matter what Michael says or does she laughs and/or agrees with (like she is flirting with him), is that she steals. She takes things from stores but gets pissed at other people when they take the same things from her, as if she has any real claim to them. It makes me so mad...perhaps just compounding frustrations. Also Michael talks as if Ruth can do no wrong, she cooks better than me, she is more confident than me, she is stronger than me, she has been through more hardships than me, she is more of a woman than me, Ruth Ruth Ruth. It really irks me for some reason.

I would really like some advice about what to do in this situation. Should I just get over it? Should I talk to Michael? I know that I need to be prepared for Ruth to live with his next year....so I need to handle this situation before I blow up at her. I also just needed to get this off my chest, so that I can enjoy the rest of my Spring Break.

Holly